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The best ways to improve self-esteem 

Dr Elizma van der Smit 

According to Armann in hoytorg.com, your self-esteem, or how you perceive yourself, is always changing. As you go through life, there will be times when your self-esteem is high and others when it is low. If you’re feeling like your self-esteem could use a boost, check out the six tips below! 

We tend to spend so much time thinking about our flaws that we forget about our strengths. This way of thinking can have a negative impact on our self-esteem. So next time you start having negative thoughts, take a moment and recognize what you’re doing. Challenge these beliefs by finding evidence against them. This will alter your way of thinking and make you view yourself in a positive light.  

2. Stop comparing yourself to others 

People do not always show their true selves on social media. So when you’re looking at your Instagram feed, try not to compare yourself to others. Clinical psychologist Linda Blair states, “You’re comparing yourself with a fantasy, and that will lead to either excessive striving or disappointment.” When you catch yourself wishing you were someone else, take a step back and think about everything you have accomplished. Remember, the successes of others don’t take away from your own.  

No one’s perfect. We all have things we wish we could change about ourselves. To prevent these flaws from having a negative impact on your self-esteem, you should separate your flaws into two categories: flaws that can be worked on and flaws that can’t be worked on. Once you’ve learned to accept yourself for who you are, you will start to find peace within yourself and spend more time focusing on your strengths rather than your weaknesses. 

4. Set manageable goals 

Blair suggests setting short- to mid-term goals for yourself. This will help you feel a sense of accomplishment once you’ve done what you’ve set out to do. If you set lofty goals, you may be unable to achieve them, and this will have a negative impact on your self-esteem.  

5. Practice self-care 

It is very important to have a self-care routine. Even if you are extremely busy, you should take a few minutes out of your day to engage in activities that promote peace and well-being. This may include taking a walk, reading a good book, or cooking a healthy meal. In addition, you should take care of your physical health by getting an adequate amount of sleep, eating the right foods, and engaging in daily hygiene. Having a self-care routine will have a significant effect on your self-esteem. 

6. Affirm your real worth 

The following exercise has been demonstrated to help revive your self-esteem after it sustained a blow: Make a list of qualities you have that are meaningful in the specific context. For example, if you got rejected by your date, list qualities that make you a good relationship prospect (for example, being loyal or emotionally available); if you failed to get a work promotion, list qualities that make you a valuable employee (you have a strong work ethic or are responsible). Then choose one of the items on your list and write a brief essay (one to two paragraphs) about why the quality is valuable and likely to be appreciated by other people in the future. Do the exercise every day for a week or whenever you need a self-esteem boost (Winch, 2016). 

The Importance of Small Steps 

It is very unlikely that you will go from poor to good self-esteem overnight. 

Instead, you will probably find you make small improvements over a period of time. The key is to look over the long term, rather than day-to-day, and focus on the big picture, not the detail of how you felt at a particular moment yesterday. 

When you feel good, or you do something good, celebrate it—but don’t beat yourself up if you occasionally slip back into negative patterns of thinking. Just pick yourself up again and try to think more positively. Eventually, this will become a habit and you will find that your self-esteem has quietly got better. 

Self-Esteem Journal For Adults  

This Understanding Self-Confidence worksheet is a helpful resource for grown-ups who want to their self-esteem and self-confidence in order to improve it.  

Journaling can promote positive self-reflection, a useful approach to enhancing your self- esteem. In this Self-Esteem Journal template, you or your client can note down meaningful daily events and reflect on them to enhance your self-knowledge.  

It may be helpful to reflect on these entries later in time to become aware of any trends in your feelings and emotions. Download the worksheet below: 

Resources 

https://positivepsychology.com/positive-self-talk/ 

This post is for informational purposes only. It should not be considered therapy. This blog is only for informational and educational purposes and should not be considered therapy or any form of treatment. We are not able to respond to specific questions or comments about personal situations, appropriate diagnosis or treatment, or otherwise provide any clinical opinions. If you think you need immediate assistance, call your local doctor/psychologist or psychiatrist or the SADAG Mental Health Line on 011 234 4837. If necessary, please phone the Suicide Crisis Line on 0800 567 567 or sms 31393. 

 

This blog is only for informational and educational purposes and should not be considered therapy or any form of treatment. We are not able to respond to specific questions or comments about personal situations, appropriate diagnosis or treatment, or otherwise provide any clinical opinions. If you think you need immediate assistance, call your local doctor/psychologist or psychiatrist or the SADAG Mental health Line on 011 234 4837. If necessary, please phone the Suicide Crisis Line on 0800 567 567 or sms 31393.