The dictionary defines self-assured as…
confident in one's own abilities or character
According to an article called Practical Ways to Improve Your Confidence (and Why You Should) in the New York Times, “Self-confidence is a bit like the running water in your house. You may not know every detail about how it works or where it comes from, but it’s painfully obvious when it’s not there. Like when your water is shut off, a dearth of self-confidence has a huge negative impact on your health and lifestyle.”
Sometimes it feels as though you never have enough hours in the day. You feel as though no matter how hard you work, you simply can't achieve everything you want. It can be overwhelming at times. If you asked most people to rate their time management skills, they'd probably wish for some improvement.
Everyone would like to work less but be more productive in the hours they do work. It would make them happier, they'd grow their career quicker, and they would be self-assured. The key is to work on your self-assuredness first and allow the rest to follow.
You can't rely on the power of positive thinking for everything because you still need to work hard to get what you want. But the power of positive thinking gives you the hope you need to manifest the things you want.
2. Open Yourself
What are you doing right now to further your cause? What is it that you want to achieve in life? DO you spend eight hours a day working for someone else, only to get home and wish it could be another way? You are entitled to time for hobbies and relaxation. But, if you consistently make those decisions right now, what you're really doing is making decisions about your future self.
If you get home from work and cook a delicious meal and enjoy it with your favorite show, that's okay. If you let it roll into the next episode and grab a snack when you told yourself you would spend an hour doing something else, that's going to have an impact on the you five years from now.
You have to be open to growing and evolving to become the person you imagine yourself to become. But it starts with the decisions you make now.
3. Challenge Negativity
You will have doubts. Having doubts is natural, even the most self-assured people are vulnerable to uncertainty. But how you react to those doubts will determine the outcome. Do you let them consume you? Because if you want to be more self-assured, you need to challenge them. Instead of jumping to conclusions, ask yourself what evidence there is that your doubt is true. It's unlikely you will find any proof, which means you don't need to keep worrying about it.
4. Seek Knowledge
How will seeking knowledge boost your self-assuredness? It's simple. The more knowledge you seek, the more information you have, and the more confident you feel. If you got an email right now asking you to give a speech, what subject would you be comfortable speaking on? A lack of knowledge can lead to self-doubt.
5. Embrace Challenges
It would be nice to live in a world where nobody had to experience hardship or pain. That just isn't the world we live in. And going through some hardship is a great way to enjoy the good things even more. More to the point, when you lean into challenges and embrace them, you get better at dealing with adversity and it builds resilience. What better way to boost your self-assuredness than that?
6. You're Not A Victim
Your mind can be your greatest asset or your biggest enemy. If you can overcome the urge to cast yourself in the role of victim, then you are building your self-assuredness and taking your biggest step toward your mind being an asset.
7. Be Grateful
When you shift your focus to being grateful for all the great things in your life, you don't have as much time for complaining. You also don't tend to notice those niggling annoyances as much because you're so busy being grateful for the good stuff. It doesn't mean you're giving up and accepting where you are. It just means you can recognize where you've gotten so far.
What better way to build self-assuredness than getting things done? Start your day with a concise to-do list and tick it off as you do. If you do this every day, not only will you get more done, but you will be able to look back and see the progress you're making.
9. Live Your Values
Are you in touch with your values? If not, take some time to work out what your core values are. If you are, are you living in alignment with them?
10. Always Follow Through
If you say you're going to do something, then you need to follow through and do it. Not only will other people respect you more, but you will start to respect yourself more too. When you start taking action it gives your woods weight and you're going to feel more self-assured.
Building your self-assuredness isn't exciting, it takes consistent work. But, if you focus on the tips above, and build your self-affirming traits, you will notice a difference in no time.
According to Medium, “Anything is Possible. You can do anything you set your mind to. And nerves will never stop you. After all, a feeling of adrenaline in big moments has been proven to give “a noticeable increase in strength and performance.” So, nerves aren’t a bad thing. Don’t fight them. Simply take your time, feel the adrenaline surge through you, break down the emotions you are feeling, praise yourself for how amazing you are and carry on regardless. Your nerves show you are out of your comfort zone and facing challenges head-on. You are living life to it’s fullest, and embracing every experience, so who cares if you get a little scared along the way?”
This post is for informational purposes only. It should not be considered therapy. This blog is only for informational and educational purposes and should not be considered therapy or any form of treatment. We are not able to respond to specific questions or comments about personal situations, appropriate diagnosis or treatment, or otherwise provide any clinical opinions. If you think you need immediate assistance, call your local doctor/psychologist or psychiatrist or the SADAG Mental Health Line on 011 234 4837. If necessary, please phone the Suicide Crisis Line on 0800 567 567 or sms 31393.